The "Log Kya Kahenge ?" Syndrome !
All of us suffer from it. When we are young we think we dont care. We want to rebel and live by the rules we write ourselves. So often I have thrown back the question at someone who has shot me with it. Afterall, Kya kahenge log ?. Then we convince ourselves that it does not matter because we dont care. "Log to kehte hi rahenge !" And who are these "log" or "people". People who we care about and likewise know and understand, as for the others....yeah what about them ? And thats how I got through college and thats how I still live my life. On my own terms. But in the not so distant past, I thought I slipped. And for a brief minute the question crossed my mind.."what will people think?". And since when did I start caring ?
At some base level don't we all seek social acceptance ? Some by the whole goddamn society. And such people spend the better years of their lives living by other people's standards and consciences. But even the most non-conformist person seeks approval from his own. Does'nt he ? Family and immediate circle of friends perhaps, but seeks it all the same. His conscience is a reflection of theirs. The "people" here is a very small number but they exist.
I realised when the question crossed my mind that I am still tied down by that desire to be accepted and respected by the standards other people have set. But I also realised that those who loved me continued to do so. It mattered not that I slipped. But my harshest critic is myself. If I could convince myself that its no big deal, if I could forgive myself for something I have never held in my opinion of others as a mistake, then the question would have never arisen. The "log" or the "people" is just in a nutshell ones own conscience. Is that what it is ??
5 Comments:
Sorry, something went wrong with the previous comment. I can identify with your dilemma. We all want acceptance from others at some inherent level. I don't think its all about conscience. Its about man not being a solitary animal. Its about us doing some things exclusively for getting others' approval.
Originally @ Jul 05, 2005 12:12 PST
By Anonymous, at 5:00 PM
Sorry, something went wrong with the previous comment. I can identify with your dilemma. We all want acceptance from others at some inherent level. I don't think its all about conscience. Its about man not being a solitary animal. Its about us doing some things exclusively for getting others' approval.
Originally @ Jul 05, 2005 12:12 PST
By Anonymous, at 5:00 PM
Parth, personally I have never worried about what otehrs think as long as my conscience is clear. But you r right. In one way or the other, man cannot go through this world alone, so complys with things just to fit in.
Originally @ Jul 07, 2005 11:15 PST
By Anonymous, at 5:00 PM
A very poignant question raised here - one that has no straight answer. The freedom to live by oneself is just as important as it is to bond emotionally with people. Not for any moral reason, but for its survival value. Social acceptance is important to bond with poeople. You can cut down the radius of the cicrle but can't make it a point. Loneliness can easily eat up any man unless he has generated enormous strength from within himself. As very few of us can achieve that, we take the alternative route. The route to love and emotions. The key, as in every struggle of life, is in balance.
-- Akshaya
Originally @ Jul 13, 2005 09:29 PST
By Anonymous, at 5:01 PM
I guess I have to agree with what you have said Akshaya. :)
Originally @ Jul 13, 2005 13:32 PST
By Anonymous, at 5:01 PM
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